The Covert Narcissist Enjoys Inflicting Pain: What kind of a warped depraved psychopath gets pleasure out of hurting another human being and in their own distorted mind somehow thinks it right to be able to do these things? Yes, they even consider themselves justified in the evil they do. Well, narcopaths do this on a daily and weekly basis throughout their lives. Many of those self righteous retributions are minor. The narc may simply injure your self esteem and make you feel inadequate or worthless. Sometimes there may even be justification for the narc being displeased as every couple has their disagreements and every individual in a relationship sometimes fails their partner. But the narc is still very different in that many times the bitter complaints and dissatisfaction coming from them is totally unjustified and mostly if not completely fabricated out of thin air. There are numerous reasons the narc puts down their partner. It could be simply to maintain control and keep that partner off balance. It could be because the narc simply doesn't tolerate any affront to their superiority and grandiosity. The root cause of this lack of concern for their partner's emotional, psychological, mental and possibly even physical well-being is that the narc, being a low grade psychopath, doesn’t think of anyone but themselves or anything beyond their own needs.

Yes, the things that that narcopath does to their intimate partners most people wouldn’t do to a stranger, someone they never met before, even if that stranger did something worthy of retribution. So we might leave the conversation at this point and come to the conclusion that the covert narcissist is simply a difficult partner, someone that will never want anything but turmoil and chaos in their lives and we as their partners simply have to put up with those benign flaws. Yes, before our knowledge of covert narcissism we simply believed that's just how our partner is, but they are basically good people underneath. That faulty assumption, the inability of the victim to comprehend the true evil of the covert narcopath, is the fatal flaw that sucks many of these targets into a world of misery that has the potential of destroying everything. Yes, the benign lies of the covert narcissist can even be cute in their obviousness and again we chalk this up to everyone having their flaws, but little do we know that those benign misrepresentations are just the tip of the iceberg. The covert narc I was with, while professing her love and commitment to me was using a social site to troll for their next persona and partner and frequently ran into problems with unwanted attention. This required her to delete her friends and followers since she wasn't really sure who the stalker was. Her excuse? An IOS update. Little did the fool realize that her ridiculous lies which were obvious to any person with a brain resulted in her making herself a target to even more creeps. But that is a digression. The point is that those benign lies are only a sign of a much more deeply rooted problem. There are far more serious and important lies being maintained. The lies of being committed, the lies of the love that narc professes, that feigned and totally fraudulent loyalty. In fact the very persona that narc presents to their partner is as phony as a three Dollar bill. But how in their right mind could the target ever conceive of such extreme duplicity. To suspect this level of depravity a person would have to be dysfunctionally paranoid. So the narc plies their trade and plays their game knowing full well that no one would ever suspect what they are really all about. Since the narc considers every relationship simply another transient experience to keep them from boredom there is usually never any danger for the narc if the victim finally finds them out. Yes an aware and awake partner is the perfect excuse for exiting the relationship for the narc. Most of the time the narc has a relationship waiting in the wings and their departure is simply the beginning of another exciting adventure to indulge in a newly fabricated persona, and personal life and occupation. So yes, the benign lies are simply the tip of the iceberg, but how is the abuse that narcs heap on their partners similar? Well that abuse is exactly the same. In a normal relationship negative feedback from one partner to another serves a very useful purpose. That feedback informs the partner how they are falling short in the relationship and the feedback makes it possible for both partners to adjust to each other and hopefully come to an understanding. The work involved with making a committed relationship work is not for the faint of heart, but the long term benefits are definitely worth it. However, that requires two honest and sincere participants and this is how the insidious bad behavior of the narcopath shows itself for what it really is: mercenary. There is no emotion involved other than the sick thrill of causing pain and extracting energy from their victim in an avaricious attempt to suck that victim dry of every last ounce of their life force.. There is no goal of building a

harmonious relationship, they are doing it for the sick and depraved pleasure of causing another human being pain and suffering. There is no means to and end, the pain that vitriol projected at the partner causes is all the narc is looking for or cares about. There is no end game for the narc, no goal of resolution or of a future peace and harmony. It is simply the pleasure of making another person suffer. That is why the sadistic covert narcopath is deservedly placed just a notch below a full blown psychopath. That is why the victim has to be observant of all of the cute and benign flaws of their partner and make sure those flaws are really motivated by a good heart.