The Narcissist is Haunted by Their Actions Part 3, Conscience: First one disclaimer. Please keep in mind these comments are my opinion. I am not a mental health professional. I am describing actual observations on ONE person that I was truly trying to understand while in a relationship. All of the actual explanation and much of the detailed insight was gained after the relationship ended. I have spent hours every day for nearly 4 years trying to understand this individual and that is my only qualification for discussing this subject. So, let's proceed. The severe, comprehensive damage that the pathological covert narcissist does to the people around them is undeniably diabolical. The narc is pure evil and the damage they do persists for years after they finally discard the victim that has been depleted and is no longer useful. The implication that a narcopath has a conscience seems to imply that the narc has some humanity, some good inside of them. Let me make this clear. The person I was with was a true pathological covert narcissist. I am still comprehending the total depravity and darkness of this person and day by day I see that this person hasn't got a shred of decency in them. I truly believe that narc's only chance is a genuine, life changing, dedication of their life to Jesus and making Him their Lord and Savior. I will always hope for that for that person. I will always hope there is a shred of humanity and conscience and remorse somewhere inside that dark heart. Furthermore, there is the possibility this person is under the influence of a demon, in which case there is hope if they could only be freed from their enslavement. Unfortunately this person's arrogance and high opinion of themselves will never allow them to “bow their knee “ to Jesus. Their body would have to suffer 20 times the amount of pain it could tolerate, and their psyche as well, before they would ever humble themselves. This person is in effect unreachable with no hope. I have now put things in context. So, are narcissists totally devoid of a conscience and remorse? Let's remember that Narcissism is on a spectrum and is a constellation of signs and symptoms and every one of those signs exhibits itself differently in every narc. Therefore, it is tough to generalize, since you have to allow for all of the variations in each and every narc. There is some general agreement that narcissists do have a trace of remorse and empathy and conscience, just that the narc will always place a higher priority on their own needs. I witnessed that personally. Here is a true example. I needed to have my cat that was suffering immediately put to sleep, but the narc actually thought it an inconvenience. I was told I should have waited, because the timing was not convenient for the narc. The narc actually became nasty right after this and was yelling and arguing with me the rest of the day. Not an ounce of empathy? Right, but here is the very critical part I left until the end. That narc did actually give me a hug and support for about 5 minutes after the actual event. Those 5 minutes where I actually needed her emotional support and drew on her energy. She seemed to care and I assumed she did. But then there was silence after those 5 minutes and not long after the hostility and anger at me, the shocking callousness that left me scratching my head for days and weeks. Of course not another word would be said about how I felt about losing my animal and I knew that I would never again expect any support from this person. If another similar situation arose with an animal I would go it alone figuring I could never put any of my needs ahead of the slightest minor needs of this person and I learned never to expect an ounce of emotional support from her. I thought this is what a man should do, give emotional support but never expect it from the woman and I adjusted my attitude, but still that calloused indifference didn't jive with the professed love she had for me, there was just something “off” and it made me wonder. The consensus is yes, narcissists do have empathy, remorse, and a conscience, but they are at such a low level and so unreliable that they are in effect absent. So now let's focus on the narcissist and how can it be that they are haunted, or plagued, by their actions and yet they don't have a conscience or remorse. Let's use another metaphor. There is and alligator in a river and their main meal is fish and they consume fish every day. Then someone releases a non native catfish into the river and over time these catfish multiply. These particular catfish have the ability to give off a shock when a predator tries to eat them. Well one day that alligator happens to bite into an electric catfish and is severely shocked. Immediately after, that alligator now looks at every fish and is afraid to bite into it. Eventually after 2 or 3 days, hunger wins out and the alligator takes another meal of fish. This time there is no shock and the alligator gradually gets back to his normal routine, consuming fish every day. Yes there was some initial hesitation, but eventually the alligator was totally back to normal. All the while the electric catfish were multiplying and then a month passes and the alligator catches another catfish and gets shocked. The alligator once again goes on a hunger strike and once again slowly gets back into the routine, but this time the alligator is more cautious and carefully observes the type of fish he will sink his teeth into. So is the alligator remorseful for having eaten fish? Has the alligator now got a conscience? It sure appears that way. Look at how carefully he looks at that fish before he eats it. He must be contemplating the poor fish's suffering before he consumes it for his meal. We know that is really not the case, it only appears that the alligator has a conscience. Now let's get back to the narcissist. The narcissist may have the emotional capacity of an alligator, but she does have the mental capacity of a human. So that electric catfish takes on a hundred different forms for the narc. She lied at a critical job interview and lost that job opportunity because of the lie, so she now realizes she needs to be honest or lie more effectively. She was too obvious about her lack of concern in the last relationship so she now more carefully mimics the signs of being a concerned supportive partner. She was caught in adultery multiple times and each time very carefully analyzed the situation and modified her behaviors to make the next adulterous affair less detectable all the while putting up a smokescreen to her partner about being remorseful and truly having a deep painful conviction of her conscience. She has refined her act to the point where she makes these professions of conscience while at the very same time is already starting and into another affair. Yes the narc has turned treachery into a high and fine art. They perfect their evil over time. So the narc is haunted by her past actions, her failure in pulling off her treachery. Her failure in lying effectively. Her failure to deceive those around her. Then we get into the other aspect of the haunting and that is the element of fear and anxiety that can turn into full blown paranoia, where the narc panics and projects all of her duplicity, treachery and malice onto another human being. She literally perceives someone with nothing but love for her, no desire whatsoever to harm her, as a predator out to damage her in any way possible, sort of like she wants to do to others. Yes, that narc is constantly looking over her shoulder. She does ponder her actions, she does think about the repercussions of her evil duplicitous treachery, her lying and deceit, but it isn't due to a conscience. She has seen her actions go terribly wrong in the past and suffered the painful results. She doesn't have a correct concept of God and how He works in people's lives because she refuses to submit her will to a greater being. She dabbles in the eastern religions and likes the concept of karma since it doesn't require an actual subjugation of herself to God. In fact, for the narc, she can retain her self decreed “goddess” status and a belief in karma at the same time, no conflicts. Karma to the narc is whatever she defines it as. One slightest injury to the narcissist may result in karma, the narcissist's brand of karma, imposing a thousand fold penalty on the wrongdoer. Yes, the touch of a feather on the narcs hand could result in the perpetrator losing their whole hand. That is the warped illogical justice the narc imposes on others that have the unfortunate experience of being sucked into her dark kingdom. So this is another source of that haunting. The narc doesn't understand that karma is not what she makes it, illogical and unpredictable, so she lives in a world of paranoia and is constantly concerned about her brand of illogical karma. Repercussions for actions which are out of proportion or unexpected for the action done. Yes, the narc is a victim of her own warped world. I have observed personally this incoherent logic, the inability to connect her actions to the potential punishment. She actually thought that another human being would suffer for a totally unrelated action that she did. Now did the narc really believe that an unrelated person could actually pay the price for her transgressions? Maybe. But of course, with the narcissist nothing is that straightforward. This could have been just another one of her covert attempts at gaslighting and manipulation, feigning the fear of karma, trying to put on an act of concern about karma but giving herself away in the presentation, by presenting an obviously counterfeit version of the karma that she was afraid of. So in conclusion the narcissist is haunted by her actions. The haunting is unlikely to have anything to do with a conscience or remorse, and more to do with fear for what might happen to her, even though you can't rule out that a small amount of conscience may be involved. Because the narc has never lived by the rules of a higher power, that of a Christian God with very consistent definitions of what sin is and somewhat predictable punishments for bad behavior, her concept of retribution for bad behavior is warped and incoherent. The narc won't even believe in the generally accepted consensus of how karma may come back to revisit someone, because again it means she would have to live by rules that others have decided on. The narc is therefore left living in a world where there are uncertain and unpredictable repercussions for any action whatsoever. This is what happens to those who are untrustworthy, duplicitous treacherous, unreliable, disloyal frauds, people who don't care for truth and justice. People who don't care to live by coherent external standards and codes of conduct. Yes the narc thinks herself free and sovereign, but has actually enslaved herself in a warped unpredictable world. The narc lives in a dark bleak world devoid of love, compassion, empathy. A world where no one can be trusted, filled with anger, envy, bitterness, fear, with nothing to have faith in or believe in other than the lie. Yes, the narc does trust in her own lies and she is led by the nose by the father of lies and chaos and incoherence. That would be the devil. He keeps her on a short leash and she follows his every command because she has been given over to her own iniquity. My opinion. Thank you for watching, your comments are welcomed.